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Thursday, April 9, 2009

A Sad Sunday in April

Just walked in the door on Sunday evening after a 6 hour drive from Arizona to the phone ringing off the hook. Come to find out I had 10 messages, most from my sister that one of my younger brothers, Kerry, had passed away.

It really wasn't much of a shock to me, even at his young age of 52. Reason being is that he was ill for the past 10 years..or probably longer and wasn't aware. He had developed Scilosis which is Silica Sand poisoning. The company he had worked for, was unaware that the sand was lethal and used it regularly in the line of work my brother performed. There were actually 4 individuals that did this same job. 3 of them already died, and my brother was the last of the 4, and he knew this. Wow..what a fate to hear.

He had one daughter, Nicole, 23 years old and 2 grandchildren. He resided in WV but was originally from PA. He was a twin to my brother, Kevin, who is taking if very hard as they were best friends through life.

Now on another note..I come from one of the most dysfunctional families around. My parents divorced after I left home, but before that, there was discord in our family constantly. My mother did not accept losing my father, so she turned to the bottle. This was over 33years ago. She is now 78. To be honest, I am surprise she has lasted this long. She also smokes like 2-3 packs a day and has ever since I can remember.

So as you can imagine, I am glad I don't live near her in WV. Unfortunately my brother, Kerry, was paying the rent on the home that they lived in (my brother and mother). So now my mother has nowhere to live.

Kerry recieved a settlement from the union for getting the poisoning. You'd think he would have put away money to take care of his funeral now this expense falls on people who have no money.

There were 6 kids in my family, me being the oldest, four brothers, and then my sister. I left PA (home) in 1972, when my first husband entered the Air Force, so I have been away for a long time, except little visits every so many years. The last time I saw my brother was in 1991 when I returned home for a class reunion.

Tomorrow all my immediate family from PA will be having a private viewing of my brother in WV and then he will be cremated and spread over his favorite fishing hole. He loved to fish, every weekend he was fishing and camping until he couldn't do it anymore due to the illness.

My thoughts are with everyone there. Plane tickets were so high and with times the way they are I just didn't have flying $$ so when they have the memorial service later in PA, I will be skyping it. This is the next best thing. Plus I won't have to deal with all the dysfunction over the "body" as is going on. So and so wanting this, and so and so wanting something else. PLEASE~If you do anything, get a trust so that folks won't be fighting over you or your belongings! How childish! But typical for my family. If there are any children of alcoholics or family of alcoholics you can relate, I'm sure.

Please call your family today and tell them you love them..Kerry knew I loved him and I knew he loved me ...and the Lord. So it is well with my soul....


AwtemNymf said...

My heart & thoughts are with you! Blessings & Hugs!!!

Cindy B said...

What sad news losing your brother. Check into if he was on disability or public aid..they sometimes can help with unexpected expenses. was he ever in the military? if so, they also will furnish a grave marker. My deepest sympathy!

Sassy Soaps N Such N Always Crafty 2 said...

Sharom my thoughts are with you. Loosing a family member is so hard even when it is expected. Thinking about ya and you need to make sure you take care of yourself. hugs